Ducky Diaries: Closing up shop

Friday, September 4, 2015

Closing up shop

OH MY GOD BECKY!!!!  LOOK AT HER POST!!!  Twice in one week!  Stella's getting her writing groove back!
 
Anyhow, last week I sent everything but the children's coming home outfits into the abyss.  I boxed it all up, literally not shedding a single tear. I kept a select few items (booties, hats, etc..) that I absolutely could not part with, but otherwise, I was all "WALK THE PLANK YE VARMIT!".....

Well, I sold the big items and gave the rest away which = the abyss,never to be seen by thine eyes again.

So that's it. Finito. Done. Shop is CLOSED! No more humans coming forth from my body. Which is a really freeing and at the same time sad and weird feeling.  My youngest is a toddler. She's out of diapers and doesn't shut up, ever. So pretty much I can send her out to get a job at this point. (LOL I wish!)

Mostly, my kids are just that, kids. Not babies. Not ever again.

D.I.C. and I have been going back and forth for probably the better part of a year. We would both say we were done, but then no major decisions would be made. I think mostly we were both done, but not quite ready to be 100 %. So "TO THREE OR NOT TO THREE" became the mantra around here. Especially with age, mine and the children. We like them to be close in age, and I am turning 31 this year. I'm way more tired than I was 5 years ago at the start of this creating humans journey. And I'm not quite sure my body could handle another pregnancy 14 months after the last.

Did you know that last Christmas was the first time I wasn't pregnant or taking care of a 6th month old?!?!?!??  It has been glorious!

At this point we're more than okay with our decision and ready to make it permanent. Both D.I.C. and I just know, we're done. Our family is complete. The level of daily chaos we're submersed in is all we can take for the next 20 years......  

I've been through every feeling imaginable at this point, which I think is normal.

I've noticed that there are pretty much 3 different categories in this phase of life for most people.

1.) You're totally okay with being completely done. Jumping for joy, actually.Handing your uterus to the nearest stranger and telling them to "go nuts!".

2.)You're mostly okay with being done, but you wouldn't freak out if there was an accident or the procedure didn't take. 

3.) You think you're okay but you start sobbing every time you see a baby, or walk by the baby section in the store.

 I think I at first was lingering between #1 and #2 but now I'm mostly just #1.  Once the decision is more 'permanent' I'll probably sway between #2 and #3 for a few days.

But for now, I'm just really okay with being done creating other humans.  Maybe if we were more like horses and they just walked from the get go, I'd like more, but, newborns, with all their amazing squish, scent, and neediness, are well, extremely needy.  And everybody is getting at least 5 hours of sleep a night at this point, so, I don't want to screw that up.

                           *The only person who even remotely cares about the baby things purge*


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