Ducky Diaries: Someone? Anyone?

Friday, March 20, 2015

Someone? Anyone?



 Remember a few weeks ago when I last pried myself from the grippy fingers of my children to write a post? Me either, maybe a little, sort of.  And how I was ALL the freaking out about being in the midst of my last week of actual monetary earning adulthood for a while?

Yea... Well, here I am in the midst of being a stay at home parent. I'm mostly loving it. Mostly.

The last few weeks have been insanely busy as will the next few.

Bear finally had his ABR (Auditory Brainstem Response) because there were long time concerns about his hearing and it possibly being a cause of him being non verbal at almost 4. So he and myself got to go to the children's hospital where I held him while he was being sedated and had to stop myself from screaming in panic, when his tongue lolled out his mouth and his head flopped. It was great. It went okay. I survived, he survived. I went to the cafeteria and ate a lot of cake while he was under sedation because I eat my feelings.  We were just fine.

NEWSFLASH- He can hear, perfectly. He really is just ignoring me.

Also, anyone vaguely remember me ranting about baby boot camp in my best Arnold Schwarzenegger voice? Rambling about how Zo and I were going head to head and how "there can only be one".   No? Well, for the sake of catching up you can read all about it here Circle of Life .

Well, I was right. So dang right it hurts.  There can only be one. And it's her. My daughter is the mother effing Highlander ya'll!  If you're too young to get this reference this probably isn't the place for you....

I came in like a wrecking ball, with my clothes on, unlike Miley. Ready to tackle potty training like I was a freaking potty training wizard master!  You shall sit on this pot and shoot forth bodily fluids for tasty morsels I said unto her!

Er I mean, sit, pee, poop, get candy. Not hard right? It was so easy I slapped myself the second day. The third day she refused to sit like at all.... Mostly because she realized I expected her to sit. This wasn't just for craps, giggles, and gummy treats anymore this was the real deal. And she wasn't having it.

So like any rational toddler she began to hold her tinkles and movements for hours..... Hours.

We were in a grid lock of intense proportions.  Then she drug all her undies into the kitchen and placed them in some weird circle and I was sure it was some form of toddler voodoo warning. I can't make this stuff up. I even posted a picture of it to Instagram. Just in case I disappeared.  So with reckless abandon I tossed the undies and declared our house the house of diapers for life. GO NUTS YA'LL!

We will try again in a few months.

But because I can't leave well enough alone and have a stress free home Tom and I went out and bought a twin size bed. Zo even helped pick it out. Then we went to buy sheets and she picked, of course, Minnie freaking Mouse.  She was so excited until I did this weird evil laugh and said she was sleeping in her own bed THAT night!  She realized shiz was serious and she proceeded to scream and hit the mattress until she fell asleep in her car seat.

It's not going terribly. I'm loving trading sleeping in my cali king for sleeping in a twin size.......  The sheets are super cute.  At some point I'm able to sneak away after unraveling myself from her weirdly long limbs that seem to knot themselves around me. I'm very tired. There's a lot of waking up in the middle of the night hunting down of the mommy and dragging her back to the Minnie Mouse lair.  But hey, it's 10:30 p.m. and I probably have another hour before I'm caught alone.

It's okay though it's all worth it. (She says as she rocks back and forth.) They can be really cute and angelic when I catch glimpses of them in the sunlight..... 





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