Ducky Diaries: Shiz just got real

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Shiz just got real

Hello, hello, hello there!!!!  

I am alive, we haz made it! 

Baby is here finally! 

I decided to take a couple of weeks off from the blog world since Mrs. Thang decided to extend her stay at hotel Uterus to 41 weeks and a day.   The last over due week nearly did me in and I rarely got off my left side thanks to some unpleasant blood pressure spikes.  160/100 anyone?  

Fun times. 

Zoey made her debut on 5/28/13 at 9:12 p.m. at 8 lbs 2 ounces and 19 and 3/4 inches thanks to an uneventful smooth sailing induction, leaving me with just one stitch..   JUST ONE STITCH! 

ZOMG!  INDUCTION!  yessum, induction.   I love you all, my fellow granola moms, but, if you're judging,  bite me. 

Compared to my sunny side up Zachary, in all his non medicated, no pain relief, 15 hours of painful natural labor, resulting in about 3 tears which required anywhere from 8-13 stitches EACH,  I'd do my induction over and over any day of the week.    

And as I look back at the differences of Zoey and Zacharys labor I ask myself, why the EFF was I so flipping anti epidural before?  Why was I all, "I am woman hear me roar!"  More like I am woman, getting my insides ripped apart hear me scream because ear plugs will not save you!!!!!

  Ahh, Ze sweet relief.   Epidural, I love you.   And my husband thanks you.   Before the epi it was an hour of  "I hate you!,  Take me  home, Okay no SERIOUSLY, carry me the EFF out of this hospital and take me home (True story)! I'm going to break your penis into a million pieces, shut up shut up shut up!!!  GIMMMMEEEEEEE THE DRUGS!!!!!!!!! PLEASE GIMMMMEEEEEE DRUGS!!!!!"   

Then the epi was administered and I was a numbed up, thankful, peaceful, farting (because you can't control it, much like in pregnancy) happy patient.

Afterwards, Tom and I played cards and watched 'Gator Boys' on Animal planet, and ate popsicles  and an hour later there was a head between my legs.   Easy peezy, pushed for 12 minutes and she was outie and my heart oooozed with love.   And my husband looked at me and told me I was glowing and he had NEVER seen me look sexier.  


Anyhoozers, we are alive.  
And attempting to adjust to life as a foursome.   So far, it's been pretty smooth sailing.  Outside of a few fits, Zbear doesn't seem to mind his new sister and she is oblivious to all his shrieks and toy flinging.  Probably because she's been jumped on for the last 10 months of her life.    

But here are some pictures! 

 I wear muh babies the way I wear muh jeans!  SNUG!!!!  LOL
 Fat baby, you make the rockin' world go round.... 
 Got milk?! 
 Daddy and Zoey.  Be still my pounding heart. 
 Big brother enjoying his pool.  :)  How is he going to be 2 on Monday!??!!??!?!  OMG!!! 
Most likely the last belly pic I will ever take.   41 weeks.    You did good Hotel Uterus.  

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