Ducky Diaries: August 2012

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Oh Yo Gabba, your wisdom is too great.....

We can all learn a thing or two from this song.         <------------ Go ahead, click on me.   :)

           Hello all, 
 We are on day 4 of our sickies here....    Thus the above song about washing your hands...   We've washed our hands, bleached our home, rotated binkies to keep the germs at bay.   Nothing is working.  Sigh.   Zachary is still sick.  Tom is sick.  And I jumped on the bandwagon Sunday.  

                                                                    HALP US!!! 

     My nose, I'm pretty certain is about to fall off or fill a tub full of snot. Tom is currently on his way to our stat care because he feels so horrible.   Zachary has resorted to full on punching and smacking when we get close to him with the nose sucker....  I'm not kidding, full on hitting us.   For a child with the mobility of a 6 month old, he packs a punch.   I've got the bruises to prove it!   

And in other news, last week we moved Zachary from his crib into a toddler bed and he is absolutely loving it!    And my back is ever so grateful.   We had such a tall crib that I had to get on my tippy toes to drop him in.  And don't even get me started on how I had to lean all the way over the railing to grab my balled up boy and drag him over to the side I was standing at to pull him out.  Oi Vey!  But, no more crib, so problem solved.  YAY!!!!      We of course had to make sure we had a very sturdy side rail to keep him from rolling out.  Although, with his hypotonia, he'd kind of just slide out of the bed and roll to the floor which is all of 10 inches away from the bed.   

First night in his big bed...  He was pleased as punch! 
            We've also started this wonderful new thing where, when he doesn't want anymore to drink, he just tosses his cup over the side of his high-chair.   I think I've lost 5 pounds this last week running from where ever I am to attempt to catch his cup before it makes a mess and or hits the floor.    Zachary of course thinks this is hilarious.    So, I give up.   I'm going to buy a plastic mat and put it under the dang chair.    

Yea.....  He doesn't match, I know.  I'm really too sick/lazy at this point to care. LOL

   Today I also wanted to Thank all my teachers.   For most, school started this week, pre-school, and day care and life is hectically trying to get back into a fall routine.  The teachers have spent part of their summer getting their classrooms ready and have spent time trying to memorize names and prepare for the year ahead.  With that said,   I really do love teachers.   I love you for teaching my child the things I can't, for guiding him, and for caring for him.  A lot of teachers I know have families of their own as well, I'm thankful for your ability to care for your own and mine as well.     <3  

      I appreciate you all!  

Friday, August 24, 2012

Land of Vapor Rub

Good day all.

      I hail from the mighty lands of Sick,  where the winds of vapor rub and froggy humidifier are blowing fiercely.    The land where sneezes are plenty, the noses red, saline rivers are flowing, and the tissues nearing extinction.

      If you have received this message, please, send HALP, and chickie noodle soups of a wide variety.

Snuggles and lots of Yo Gabba Gabba and books, can be foreseen in my near future.   A cancellation of Zacharys first hair cut is also on the agenda for today.  Which is okay, I kinda sorta, OKAY I'LL ADMIT IT, really don't want to get his hair cut, because then he'll no longer be a baby.... my baby....  I'll take the snot and snuggles I can get.    Hair cuts can wait...

In other news, Zacharys IFSP ( Individualized Family Service Plan),  is going in front of a panel through his E.I. (Early Intervention) to see if he qualifies for in home P.T. (physical therapy) through a professional.  Which, in my opinion, would be fantastic...  I personally feel he will benefit from extra P.T.  At the moment I think Tom and myself can only do so much and we're at that limit.

Just a little example, now along with his daily ham-string stretches, physical therapy with his physical therapist, mom/dads attempt at physical therapy at home,  joint compressions, hip joint compressions, sitting practice, rolling practice, weight bearing, standing, and attempting to find any way to communicate with the wee babe, sensory homework....... and work, and school and life...... and SHIT!  Makes me tired just typing all that and looking into our daily life from the outside perspective....

But I digress, because we're trucking along and we will keep on trucking....   :)  

However-  I think we can safely assume (fingers crossed, EVERYONE cross your flipping fingers!) we are on our way to having an independent sitter.....  Like, for real this time!  

Hello Camera...  

Toys check, Tissues check, Complete and utter cuteness
Double and triple check!  

Xbox controller-
We are ready to battle the sickies!  

Monday, August 13, 2012

I don't wanna........



  1. Too small or unimportant to be worth consideration.
  2. (of a person) Without power or influence.
Synonyms:trifling - trivial - negligible - unimportant - petty

                                                    Hello, my name is Candace....  And sometimes, the above definition explains fully how I feel.    Sometimes it's a positive thing.   Sometimes a negative.  

      Some days,  life is hard.  Some days it's not.  Some days are beautiful.  Some days are ugly.  

*I don't talk about my faith often, because, in my opinion, it's mine, that doesn't mean it's yours.* 

However,  lately, at times, I wonder,  why.    A lot of "why".   "Why, Why, Why?"  "What did I do?"  "What do I do?"  "What should I do?"  "God, what do you want me to do?"  

Sometimes I feel lost.  Sometimes I feel angry.  Sometimes, I want to slap a b!tch.....  As in the Dr.s   and the physical therapists, and the E.I. specialists, and the geneticists,   not really, I don't really want to slap them.... Okay, no, sometimes I do. .....    If we're telling the truth here, I want to slap someone in the medical field about once a week.... I'm just being honest.  

Why?......   Because, I don't want to do more testing...  I don't want to watch Zachary get poked, prodded, put to sleep against his will through drugs....   I don't want to watch him suffer anymore.  I really don't.   But sadly, that time has come...  And I want to run, kicking and screaming, far away and take my baby with me.   

Why do we feel the need to dissect and study the ones that are different?   To find what makes them unique?   The Dr.s have found a puzzle in my son and they want to look at him through every microscope....   I, on the other hand, want to break their microscopes.     Sadly I can't.  And it is the end of the summer and the deal was,  take the summer off and then resume testing.    

Blah.   So, tonight, beer will be my friend and tomorrow I will make the appointments....   

Here's some sad and uplifting music for you.   Anybody know why Fiona Apple is so depressed????   

Monday, August 6, 2012

"The Out of Sync Child"

             So those of you that read my blog frequently probably notice,   I don't normally post this close to a previous posts date, nor do I post so late in the evening.   Please forgive me, but today has just been one of those days....   The type of day where I realize the significance of my sons delays, and his inability at obtaining self mobility.     And one of those days where your child amazes you on so many levels you feel like your heart will explode...    Basically one of those days where I run between emotional break-down and well, emotional break-down.....    

             We had Physical Therapy today and I let Zachary go back alone...  Weirdest feeling EVER!  That was the first time I haven't been in that room cheering him on.   I feel like I've become too much of a distraction though so, I had to cut the umbilical cord and let him grow a little without me.  Sigh.

            Also -  In other BREAKING news....  Finally after 4 months of saying I think Zachary has sensory issues,  and being told "No he doesn't" , his PT (Physical Therapist, for those of you not familiar with the acronym)
            asked me if she could do 'Joint Compression' therapy on him last Monday as well as pointed out that his hamstrings are no longer tight yet he still tip-toes and toe curls (WELL, FLIPPING YEA, DUH!!! I TOLD YOU!  In my best professional tone.....)      Lo and behold!  After joint compressions on his hips, the BABE he has sat!   For minutes, long minutes, opposed to short seconds on his very own little buttocks!

         She asked me more questions about textures, food, yada yada.....   And came to the conclusion that Zachary is our very own little "Sensory Seeker".  

           Yay!    More Bullshit thrown into our disheveled life.  

   Todays session I wasn't in the room but we were sent away with a list of things to purchase and homework to continue to stick our toes in a pan of dried beans...  I thought I was hot shit and would bypass all of that and stuck some grass in Zacharys hand this evening....   That scenario did not play out as planned.   He was NOT a happy camper....  

       Oh and my favorite part of today,  had to go to the D.M.V.  to get my new license with my new last name on it....  With Zachary.....  He was good for the first 30 minutes we were sitting there, but beyond that, I couldn't expect anything else.  However I will say, it is funny as all crap when you are doing the vision part and you have to raise your hand when the blinkie  light comes on and repeat the line of letters....   I had to do it twice, even though my eyesight is 20/15....   Why because one hand was shooshing, comforting, feeding, the baby and the other was trying to keep track of the lights...  I surely was great entertainment for the other waiting recipients.

     Thanks for baring with me, here are some pictures...   On the one picture, there will be a question...

Sensory, SPD, and knowledgeable mommas, your help is needed!

We bought this today, and so far it is great...  However, I need something more infant/toddler oriented...
Zachary still isn't mobile, so this is only a partial help.
p.s.  when I asked the lady at the book store where this was she took me to a section and said
"You'll find what you need to know about Autism here."
I wanted to cry...

A sensory toothbrush...  Yea... Basically a $7.00 fricken stick with lumps on it.
But he likes it.
In fact, threw a fit when I took it before dinner.

No PT reason for this book.
Just running out of books.
This is great!  Zachary loved it as did I.
$6.00 well spent.  

My baby, my hero, my handsome prince. 

My new license picture...
Do I have a lazy eye?
I can't tell....  
It's freaking me out.